Monday, February 21, 2011

Painting and dieting.....

Hello out there. :)
So i was up to 192, then went down to 186 all naturally. I have started taking a mild diet pill and working out, Making better choices in eating too. I must admit it is harder than I could have ever imagined. My disease tricks my brain into thinking the easy way is the indulge in anorexia and bulimia. I also lose weight alot faster. This time I wont do it, or at least try as hard as i can not too. Zac has been giving me the best support. What is awesome too is I am going to family reunion in July to Vegas and my goal is to be toned and down to 130. then My ultimate goal is 120. Zac and I woke up a six this morning, ugh but at least I got to work out and write in my blog today. 
so I was just looking for a piece of gum in my purse and it made me sad that I found laxatives....ugh to see things like that you feel powerless to your disease. I have struggled with all this since I was 13 and it has just gotten worse over the years. I feel awful that not one person ever caught on with my constant weight changes and illnesses. It also messed with me in the head where I am on anti depressants and anti anxiety medicine. 
Now being 22 I want to be as honest as I can, no more secrets, I have almost died to many times. 
Lots of love

No comments:

Post a Comment